Holy interrupting blog post, Batman!

Hello all of you (nine or ten) loyal readers! We thought we'd give you a little treat this week, since we've been kind of sucking at updating this blog on a regular basis. As you know, we started doing these shortest distance things via facebook, so we thought it might be fun to share some of our earliest posts with you now. Enjoy!
(Side note: we're busy busy college students, and while this blog is clearly worthy of our undivided attention it is unfortunately not all that important to our professors, who for some dumb reason expect us to get all of our homework done well and handed in on time. So if we don't post updates weekly, don't blame us. Blame the damn teachers for making us do actual schoolwork instead.)

Pumpkins to Papua New Guinea:

Pumpkins are orange. Lots of things are orange, for instance orangutans. Orangutans are animals, not unlike guinea pigs. Guinea pigs are neither pigs nor do they come from New Guinea, as you would assume from their name. Papua New Guinea is a country in Asia that guinea pigs do not come from.

Bears to Battleships:

Bears are large hairy creatures that live in the wilder lands of various parts of the world. Bears also like to eat blueberries. And sometimes people who are picking blueberries, but that's unrelated and sort of horrible. Blueberries, while they grow, are sometimes housed in little metal cages so that animals (like bears) won't eat them. The skeletons of battleships are just metal structures before people put battleship all over them (or blueberries inside them.) There you go. Bears to battleships, via blueberries.

Foxes to Folding Chairs:

Foxes are generally orange, which is a popular color and flavor of popsicles, which are usually eaten in the summer, which is when many people like to sit outside, and because of this shitty economy the only things people can afford to sit on are folding chairs.

Buoys to Bangladesh

Buoys are those metal things that float around in the ocean that aren't boats. I really don't know much about the things other than the fact that they bob up and down in the water just far enough away from the shore so that we don't accidentally knock into them when we're swimming around or surfing in the ocean. They pretty much indicate the all too necessary "don't swim beyond here or you'll be eaten by a shark or carried away with the current" boundary. I think. I don't go swimming in the ocean much, but I imagine that's what those things are there for.
I also know that the word buoy is ridiculously annoying to type. Try it. Buoy. No matter how many times I try I can't type that word without fucking up. Buioy. See? That sneaky little "i" comes in outta nowhere.
But I digress. Buoys are always in the ocean. If you were awake for most of elementary school you'd know that about seventy percent of the earth is covered by ocean. Technically there is only one ocean because all of those big bodies of salt water on the earth are interconnected, but because mankind has some sort of issue with sharing we've divided the world ocean up into five different mini-oceans. These oceans are: the Pacific Ocean, the Atlantic Ocean, the Indian Ocean, the Arctic Ocean, and the easily forgettable Southern Ocean (it borders Antarctica, so who cares).
The Indian Ocean is bordered by Africa, Australia, and southern Asia. I guess it's called the Indian Ocean because India's kind of a big country that sticks out in the middle of this ocean like a sore thumb. Bangladesh is right next to India, and a little bit of it lies on the Indian Ocean. I think. The map on Wikipedia is mad tiny. Oh wait, I can zoom in....yep, definitely. It's got some ocean. Cool.


Hammocks to Henry VIII